That is the question I ask myself: why do I now believe that my current (slim) body is permanent while I never thought that before? And that I can now give away all my old and oversized clothing? I never did that before. Sure, there have been several times in the past that I lost a few pounds, sometimes even more than just a few. And then I had clothes that were clearly too big for me. And yet, I never gave them away, I never donated them to a good cause, and I certainly never just threw them away. No, I hung them in the back of my closet, unconsciously thinking “I’ll need this later” …
Later always comes earlier than one thinks
And yes, that later always came much earlier than I expected. Before I knew it, I pulled those pants out of the back of my closet. Cause they were definitely more comfortable than those of a size smaller .. sigh … How could that be? How could I never believe that – if I had achieved a lower weight by eating and living much more healthier – I would retain that lower weight? Well, have you ever heard of “self-fulfilling prophecy”? Well, I’m so aware of that now!
Where do I belong then?
By always thinking I will need those larger clothes again, I unconsciously made sure that I would indeed need those clothes again. With my thoughts I let my body (unconsciously) to the size and weight that I thought ‘belonged to me’.
And now? Yes, not anymore! I have learned two things in the past year: 1 I get what I predict, and 2: I deserve a better body! Everyone knows the term ” self-fulfilling prophecy”, or if you don’t know it literally, you know or can sense the meaning behind it: everything you expect will come true. Because you work towards it yourself, unknowingly. But that second discovery was really new to me. Of course I think for myself that I deserve all the beauty of the world – rationally. But emotionally? And there it is: the fact that you yourself formed convictions about yourself in your youth, through events that you experienced, conversations that you heard / had with people who influence you, and formed self-image issues about yourself give you the body that belongs to those beliefs.
Why always size 46 (3XL) again?
I always thought that I had really earned every cake, every candy, every treat. The sun was shining: it deserved a cake, a stranger smiled at me in the street: I had to treat myself to celebrate that, I reached a goal (lost 10 pounds, for example): well ironically, I really felt I deserved to treat myself with all the best food available. You understand, I took every opportunity to celebrate. With delicious treats. And that pattern ensured that I always, without any delay, returned to my trusty size 46 (3XL).
Then why do I know that isn’t the case anymore for me?
The big answer for me came with therapy. Yes, good-old-fashioned therapy. Who would have thought that for losing weight one needs therapy? I certainly didn’t. But nothing turned out to be further from the truth: because I discovered through the therapy which emotions and thoughts fed my eating habits, I could finally shed that old eating pattern. And boy what a relieve that has given me!
What held me back?
What was my limiting belief that led me to size 46 every time? I had built up an old belief in my youth that I could only make myself feel special if I treated myself (with delicious treats). And feeling special if, for example, someone did something nice for me, or if I got attention from someone I was looking up to, or if it was just a beautiful day, I couldn’t do it without having something tasty to eat. Now that I know this, I have been able to break through this old belief and replace it with a much better new one: I am (just like everyone else!) special. And I don’t need any good food to know that.
What about you?
Do you want to know what limits you from having the body that you want? And do you also want to feel ready to dispose of all your old and oversized clothing, once you’ve reached that body? Then come and check out the website to see when I’ll be giving the next workshop on how you can achieve this for you:
PLEASE NOTE: this will be announced in January.
You can also have a private session with me
Or, in the meantime and if you prefer to work with me 1 on 1: book a discovery call in which we can discuss this process for you.